The Raw End of the Deal

ok. i know i was supposed to be better about blogging, but life with three kids is a bit harder than i thought. i was hoping that #3 would spend most of her days sleeping peacefully, but that lasted about a week. her 2 naps throughout the day last a mere 30 min and the rest of the time, she demands to be held, entertained, kissed, snuggled, fed, burped, and walked around. needless to say, my back is killing me.

i've started going to the gym religiously. never have i been so diligent and disciplined. make no mistake - i haven't turned over a new leaf and become one of these people who are obsessed with working out. i'm just trying to get my 2 hours of "me" time while the gym daycare watches my baby. i take nice, long, leisurely showers. i spend 10 min in the sauna getting my face to turn the beet red shade that i covet. i put on make-up every day as if i have a hot date planned for the evening. i will do anything to fill up those two hours. i should probably be spending even more time on the treadmill, stairs, or elliptical, but i don't. like i said, it's still 'me' we're talking about here.

the weight is coming off ever so slowly. a few days ago i had an epiphany in the middle of the night, and woke up the next day determined to lay off the sweets. i barely survived that day. i was craving sweets so bad and really felt sympathy for smokers and drug addicts. quitting is no joke. it's so hard. i miss those days when i looked like a toothpick and ate whatever i wanted. i miss those days when i didn't care about real food and just ate chocolate and twinkies. that all changed when i met alex and he introduced me to avocados and mushrooms. anyway, i came to the realization that i cannot deprive myself of sweets and have attempted this thing called "moderation." although i must confess, today i ate dippin dots (what am i? 5?) and a chocolate croissant. and while i'm on the subject of confessions...forgive me father, for i have sinned.

yesterday, #1 was home sick with the stomach flu and #3 was napping in her crib. the hubs was home. it was close to 11:00am and i had an infant appointment at the gym. i was all set to go and wake #3 up and leave the hubs home with #1 - when he said, "just let #3 stay home, why risk her getting sick from one of the other kids at the gym?" it made perfect, logical sense. so i cancelled the appt and started driving towards the gym solo. i checked my email at the stop light and there it was: 25% off dresses at loehmanns. all of a sudden, i remembered an upcoming wedding and vacation and visualized my pre-pregnancy wardrobe (that no longer fits) and my ghastly post-pregnancy wardrobe (that consists of black leggings and hideous, milk-stained maternity shirts)...and made a u-turn and headed towards loehmanns. i was gone for an hour and 45 minutes and stuffed my trader joes grocery bag with 2 dresses and 2 skirts. i came home and when asked, "how was your workout?" i replied, "it was great!" and thought that was the end of that. but then he kept going, "you were gone for a while..."

me: "was I? huh - i guess so." i promptly marched upstairs and quickly hung up any trace of the fruits of my crime.

since we're on the topic of leaving my kids and husband - i'm taking a vacation from motherhood in april with one of my favorite people in the world - my sister. the hubs and i typically take a vacation together sans kids, but given the age of #3, we felt 3 kids would be a bit of a burden on our parents...so we came up with the brilliant plan of vacationing separately while the other spouse stays at home with all three kids. i'm going to antigua for 5 nights and the hubs is planning a trip to what my friend calls, "the most beautiful and romantic city in the world" - prague for 7 nights with his cousin. i can't help but feel like i got the raw end of the deal. originally, my husband was considering a trip to iceland and i thought phew! iceland is not really up there on my places to visit - so i was pleased. but prague is a different story!! i've been wanting to go and i just want to stomp my feet and throw a tantrum. to top it off, i haven't seen my husband plan a trip like this - EVER. he is researching like crazy, checking out 5 star hotels, and spending all his free time planning this vacation.

i'm kind of excited for alex to experience a week in the life of taraneh. i am hoping i will return to a lot more appreciation and respect for what it is i do on a daily basis. i am also hoping i will not return to mounds of unfolded laundry, which has happened in the past. i think it's important that we both get away for a little R&R and return recharged and rejuvenated. i also think it's important to buy your spouse a very nice souvenir from prague. :)